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Process, not product

Embracing process is deeper training than simply learning a new way to paint. Itā€™s a new way to see, and itā€™s the basis of all really good art.

Belfast Harbor, oil on canvasboard, 14X18, $1594.

The hardest part of painting class is the first day, or first few days. Sometimes the students who have the most difficulty are those who are already good at painting or drawing.

Often, they are terrified about painting in front of others. They feel as if theyā€™ll be judged and found lacking. They have a deeply buried nut of pride in being ā€œpretty good at art,ā€ and theyā€™re afraid to expose that to reality. I recognize this because I was once that student myself. When someone resists me, I am patient because I remember all the backchat I gave my teachers back in the day.

These students donā€™t realize theyā€™ve already taken the most difficult step, which is signing up for classes. Itā€™s an admission that they know something is lacking in their technique. They may also be remembering making art with teenage peers, who can be the most judgmental of all critics. Adults are not cruel like that; theyā€™re genuinely excited for each otherā€™s successes.

Fishing shacks at Owl’s Head, 11X14, $1087

Weā€™re never good judges of our own work as weā€™re doing it. The disconnect between what weā€™ve envisioned and what actually happened is too pronounced. The painting of Belfast harbor, above, is a great example. I was so focused on what it lacked that I never noticed that the color, structure and paint handling were excellent. It had to sit for months on a rack in my studio before I realized it was finished, and itā€™s now one of my favorite paintings.

Thatā€™s where a teacher can be helpful, and why positive criticism is so useful. But time itself is a great healer. It allows you to stop seeing the painting from inside your own head.

Often adult students have been trained to look for results. Thatā€™s an unfortunate byproduct of our commercial culture. It makes it difficult to sit back and enjoy learning the process.

Balletic sway, 9X12, $696 unframed.

I once had a delightful student named Ann, who was a good beginning painter. She would start strong, and when it looked like she had a winner on her hands, sheā€™d announce to the class, ā€œIā€™m painting this for [  ].ā€ That was an instant jinx. She changed the way she saw her work. It became something tangible, a product to be given as a gift. She started seeing it through the potential recipientā€™s eyes, and that meant she only saw its shortcomings. That flood of negativity paralyzed her. Annā€™s warm generosity was, in fact, getting in the way of her painting.

This, by the way, is the difficulty of commissions. The artist starts from the transaction, rather than the germ of an idea. In a world of extremely slick, photoshopped experiences, the physical reality of paint is always going to look clunky and awkward. Thatā€™s part of its charm.

My greatest challenge as a teacher is to get people to let go of what they think they know and to relax into the process of exploration. I give them a protocol, and thatā€™s important, but itā€™s hardly the only thing. Embracing process means divorcing yourself from the results, no longer worrying about whether todayā€™s painting is ā€˜goodā€™ or ā€˜badā€™, just that itā€™s been painted and youā€™ve gotten one step closer to your inner vision. Thatā€™s deeper training than simply learning a new way to paint. Itā€™s a new way to see, and itā€™s the basis of all really good art.

Action vs. Reaction: the boring times in the studio

Sometimes the balance between creativity and routine gets out of kilter, and it never seems to be in favor of creative time.
Places I’d rather be right now: Headwaters of the Hudson, by Carol L. Douglas, which anyone who’s been to Lake Tear of the Clouds would recognize as a romantic personification rather than the real thing.

Iā€™m sorry there was no post yesterday. Grandchildren are human petri dishes, and mine gave me their norovirus. (Thatā€™s the nature of children, and I would change nothing.) Iā€™m feeling better today, but not 100%.

Ironically, Iā€™d planned to write about action vs. reaction. Every job has moments of each designed into it. For example, the EMT who saves your life is mostly reactive, responding to whatā€™s happening to you and the instructions heā€™s getting over his radio. The engineer designing a new system of 0s and 1s is mostly active. As he interacts with his team, though, he is reactive.
But thatā€™s in the particular. Generally speaking, most successful people are reactive much of the time. Theyā€™re listening to their competitors, their peers, and their customers, and trying to give the people what they want.
Palm and Sand, by Carol L. Douglas
The self-employed artist is stubbornly individualistic, but that doesnā€™t save him from reactivity. We treasure our active tasks, like painting or marketing, that we initiate and drive ourselves. Then there are tasks that are in response to othersā€™ initiatives. For example, at 2 PM today, I must send an email. I donā€™t know why this particular moment is important to the organization but I do know that a small part of my mental energy today will be spent wondering whether gmailā€™s delayed-send feature really works.
Painting commissions, while on the ā€˜creativeā€™ side of our ledger, are fundamentally reactive tasks. This is why some artists donā€™t enjoy them as much as other work. The impetus, the spark of idea, didnā€™t originate with us.
All sole proprietors exist in this maelstrom of action and reaction, which tug and vie for our scarce time.
Spring, by Carol L. Douglas, painted down the road a piece, on an April day.
Chief among the reactive tasks is bookkeeping, which Iā€™d never do at all if the IRS didnā€™t prod me into it. Before I can file my taxes, I must audit my records to determine if theyā€™re true. The whole job takes me the better part of a week. I think I should try doing the audits monthly. However, every February, I am so happy to be free of bookkeeping that I just go back to the Excel equivalent of stuffing receipts in an envelope.*
This year I decided to try to paint in the mornings and work on bookkeeping in the afternoons. This was a total failure. I would just settle in to my canvas and it would be time to move over to the dining room and its carefully separated piles of papers.
Iā€™m back to my usual technique, which is to schedule tax prep during the nicest week of winter weather. Itā€™s a knack, I tell you.
Why canā€™t I just ignore my taxes for a week and get back to them when the weather gets bad? Despite my protestations that I wouldnā€™t do this to myself again, Iā€™ve arranged to be shot out of a cannon again this spring. On March 4, Iā€™m leaving for a short painting trip through Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana. My third daughter is getting married in May. And after that is my regularly scheduled season. Itā€™s now or never, and the IRS doesnā€™t like never.
Fall cookies for another daughter’s wedding. That won’t work for May!
I have learned that tasks tend to be amorphous until theyā€™re pinned down. That means that small ones, like ā€œorder paintā€ loom as large as ā€œbake 1000 cookies for the wedding reception,ā€ a job I will be doing without my designer pal Jane this year. Writing them down and classifying them helps me keep them in perspective.
Iā€™ve written before about Bobbi Heathā€™s time management system, here. Itā€™s a simple system that can stop you from losing your mind when youā€™re overwhelmed. Whatever system works for you, now is a great time to deploy it, before the weather gets fine and youā€™re on the run.
*I had a GPS that kept mileage records. I just retired it and bought MileIQ. Itā€™s fantastic for the plein airpainter, who starts and stops and is pulled along by the wind.

What does it mean to be a successful artist?

To make progress, we must experience the doldrums as well as the exhilaration of creativity.
This sketch of the Ellwanger Estate in Rochester went from being something I hated to being a favorite painting.
One of my artist friends is struggling right now. Her current work feels stale to her, but when she pushes the boundaries, she is uncomfortable. She worries that the results feel like ā€œtoo, too much.ā€ Like most of us, she is looking for that sweet spot that combines marketability with room to grow and challenge herself.
Another artist friend wonders how to tell if youā€™re a successful artist. She proposed that you are a success if you bring joy to someone. I pointed out that a lot of people have some really awful art hanging on their walls. It apparently makes them happy. Bringing joy, then, may be setting the bar too low.
I spent one memorable spring consistently overshooting the colors. I wasn’t happy then. I am now.
In other career paths, success is measured by dollars. In art, financial success is dependent on things other than artistic mastery, like connections, marketing skills, organization, and financial resources. Many great painters have labored in poverty and obscurity through most or all of their careers. Artistic success, then, must first be defined in artistic, not financial, terms. The problem is that the goal is constantly shifting.
As artists, we struggle to achieve some effect or transmit an idea. This struggle can be quite lengthy, lasting weeks or months. When we succeed, we can churn out art, seemingly effortlessly. During that short golden period, work is fun and exciting. We feel like weā€™ve finally ā€˜got itā€™.
I worked on site on Lower Falls at Letchworth for the better part of a season. That meant hiking to the bottom of the gorge with my painting kit. It was no fun.
Sadly, this is a fleeting thing.
Soon another question or problem surfaces. We realize a deficiency, or we need to explore a different subject. The searching and questing starts again. Work feels halting, incompetent, and difficult.
There are times when it seems like Iā€™ve never held a brush before. Iā€™m awkward, unpolished, and incapable. No, Iā€™m not suffering from amnesia. If Iā€™m doing my job right, I havenā€™tdone this before, because part of what we artists doā€”or ought to doā€”is explore uncharted areas. Luckily, Iā€™m a process-driven, rather than results-driven person. Otherwise, Iā€™d lose my mind.
The struggle at the Lower Falls meant that painting its mate, Upper Falls at Letchworth, was easy.
Some of the pieces that felt most awkward at the time actually turned out to be road-markers for the forward journey. Thatā€™s why Iā€™m never keen on scrubbing out ā€˜failuresā€™ after a painting session. I just canā€™t tell what a painting means when Iā€™m working on it.
Embracing a cycle of success and struggle is the heart of the artistic process. To make progress, we must allow ourselves to experience the doldrums as well as the exhilaration of the creative process.
The Long Road Home is another work that had to be dragged out of my fingertips.
When someone is at the bottom of one of these cycles, I recommend they read (or reread) the classic Art & Fear by David Bayles and Ted Orland. They address the pertinent issues of habit, persistence and routine. If nothing else, the book reminds us that weā€™re not alone in this struggle.

Rejection

Queensboro Bridge construction, 10X8, Carol L. Douglas

A friend got a rejection letter from an agent on whom she had pinned hopes. This is where her life as an artist begins, where she begins to look inside herself for approval and develops a strong sense of the value of her own voice.

Rejection either makes you or breaks you. Some of us walk away from the encounter so badly bruised that we stop putting our work in the public marketplace. Others get up and paint again.

The Dugs in Autumn, 12X9, Carol L. Douglas
Rejection is part of the artistic process. Last year, I encouraged my pal Tarryl to apply for a show that I thought was a slam-dunk. She was rejected. This year she encouraged me to apply for a show that she thought I would get in. I was rejected. This has nothing to do with either of our abilities or worth as people or inherent talent. Itā€™s about the taste and style of the judges.
Itā€™s paradoxically true that we can be rejected for being either too good or too bad; itā€™s easiest for critics to see and understand what has already been done, what is in the safe middle ground.
ā€œWhen they organized their first exhibition [the Impressionists] all already mature artists who had been working for fifteen years or more… Dissatisfied they may have been, but they did not consider that they were as yet beyond the pale. Manet, in fact, still endeavored to show in the Salon, and was bitterly disappointed when he was rejected.ā€ (Richard J. Boyle, American Impressionism)

Indiana sketchbook #1, 12X6, Carol L. Douglas
Let me know if youā€™re interested in painting with me on the Schoodic Peninsula in beautiful Acadia National Park in 2015 or Rochester at any time. Click here for more information on my Maine workshops! Download a brochure here.

Making it look easy

Renocation of the Kirkland Hotel, acrylic on canvas, by Bruce Bundock.

Remember my pal Bruce Bundock from Kingston? Heā€™s on a roll this year. The catalog for his Faces of Vassar is out. And he is featured in this monthā€™s Acrylic Artist Magazine as one of five winners in the 60th anniversary show of the National Society of Painters in Casein and Acrylic.

The Kirkland Hotel at Kingston is on the National Register of Historic Places. Bundock painted it not as a tidy, quaint renovated place, but in the process of shedding its old skin and acquiring its new. ā€œMy painting is a form of investigative reporting on light, form and content,ā€ he says.
Renovation of the Kirkland Hotel, #2 by Bruce Bundock
Bruce started by making plein air studies from the parking lot of the hotel and proceeded to a large scale drawing. From there he gridded and painted the finished work. In other words, he works hard to make it look easy.
Bruce’s drawing of the Kirkland Hotel project.
Let me know if youā€™re interested in painting with me on the Schoodic Peninsula in beautiful Acadia National Park in 2015 or Rochester at any time. Click here for more information on my Maine workshops! Download a brochure here. 

Gender and creativity

Couple, 24X30, oil on canvas, by Carol L. Douglas
Yesterday, I was reading a short essay by Maria Popova on the premise that psychological androgyny is a trait of highly creative individuals. What fascinated me were the quotes she chose from her source, psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi:  
ā€¦ When tests of masculinity/femininity are given to young people, over and over one finds that creative and talented girls are more dominant and tough than other girls, and creative boys are more sensitive and less aggressive than their male peersā€¦

Waiting, 24X36, oil on canvas, by Carol L. Douglas
Psychological androgyny [refers] to a personā€™s ability to be at the same time aggressive and nurturant, sensitive and rigid, dominant and submissive, regardless of gender. A psychologically androgynous person in effect doubles his or her repertoire of responses and can interact with the world in terms of a much richer and varied spectrum of opportunities…
It was obvious that the women artists and scientists tended to be much more assertive, self-confident, and openly aggressive than women are generally brought up to be in our society. Perhaps the most noticeable evidence for the ā€œfemininityā€ of the men in the sample was their great preoccupation with their family and their sensitivity…
At my advanced age, Iā€™ve had the opportunity to observe three generations of gender roles: my parentsā€™, my own, and my kidsā€™ generations. I have known a lot of people, and I donā€™t think that most of them operate within this caricature of behavior. The ones that do, inevitably seem miserable.
Masculinity, 16X20, oil on gessoboard, by Carol L. Douglas
Most successful artists I know live extremely conventional lives. That has nothing to do with conforming to or rebelling against culture, and everything to do with expediency. On the other hand, weā€™ve all met artistic poseurs who concentrating on outward social imagery rather than content (usually as rebels). Theyā€™re always failures.
If there’s a characteristic of the creative temperament, it’s that most creatives spend their time thinking about their work, rather than where they fit in their tribe.
Submission, 18X24, oil on canvas, by Carol L. Douglas

Remember, youā€™ve got until December 31 to get an early-bird discount for next yearā€™s Acadia workshop. Read all about it here, or download a brochure here

Starting and searching

Rock Study, 11X14, by Carol L. Douglas. I did this rock study with my pal Bruce Bundock and hated it at the time. I love it today.
I admire the well-planned, carefully-drafted, meticulously-executed painting, but something happens between the time I start and the time I finish. A furious spirit overtakes me that drives me irresistibly in the opposite direction.
This is why Iā€™m very reluctant to wipe out all but the absolute worst starts. In so many cases, what I thought was bad five years ago has turned out to be pivotal in my evolution as a painter. Iā€™ve come to listen to my ā€˜badā€™ paintings; theyā€™re usually trying to tell me something.
Rockport, 9X12, by Carol L. Douglas.
Textile artist Jane Bartlett sent me the list below, which was (according to the Internet) found among Diebenkornā€™s papers after his death in 1993. I havenā€™t corrected the spelling or punctuation, even though they pain me.
Notes to myself on beginning a painting (by Richard Diebenkorn)
1. attempt what is not certain. Certainty may or may not come later. It may then be a valuable delusion.
2. The pretty, initial position which falls short of completeness is not to be valued ā€” except as a stimulus for further moves.
3. Do search. But in order to find other than what is searched for.
4. Use and respond to the initial fresh qualities but consider them absolutely expendable.
5. Dont ā€œdiscoverā€ a subject ā€” of any kind.
6. Somehow donā€™t be bored ā€” but if you must, use it in action. Use its destructive potential.
7. Mistakes canā€™t be erased but they move you from your present position.
8. Keep thinking about Pollyanna.
9. Tolerate chaos.
10. Be careful only in a perverse way.

Rock Tumble, 16X20, unframed, by Carol L. Douglas
I will be teaching in Acadia National Park next August. Read all about it here, or download a brochure here